Have you ever been with someone who seems absolutely perfect on a first date, but once you get into a relationship with them, you discover they are horrible relationship material? According to Northwestern University communication studies professor Michael E. Roloff, this is because people who carefully monitor their behavior tend to avoid presenting their true personalities—even with romantic partners. Although these people are not necessarily intending to be deceptive with their love interests, they are more likely to avoid anything that threatens the public face they wear—including the self-disclosure needed to foster intimacy.

On the other hand, Roloff's findings—which will be published in Communication Reports—say that those who are low self-monitors, and somewhat socially awkward, are better in relationships. This group of people, however, may be difficult to be involved with because their lack of social editing often results in hurt feelings.

(Source: Why Perfect Dates Make Lousy Partners. Retrieved February 13, 2008 from Live Science.)
Photo: ©sxc.hu/nyee (Nick Yee)

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